Day 106 "Turning The Light Switch on Eternity"

When was it that I began to think of everything filtered by an eternal perspective?

Was it when I first became a Christian at the age of 16? I had heard a lot about hell and heaven and about the sins of my life up to this point, but I think I was too interested in making sure that I didn't wind up in hell when I made my decision to invite Christ into my life to be my Lord and Savior. But there were far too many things, yet, that I wanted out of life to let go and pursue eternity. No, it wasn't when I first became a Christian that my thoughts turned towards eternity. Besides, I had my "get out of Hell free card." It was Jesus Christ.

Was it at the lowest point in my life? I was just 20, and my sophomore year had just ended at the University of Utah. In the Fall, I experienced a break up in a relationship with a girl who was from St. Louis. At Christmas break, I went home to Florida and found out that my dad and my mom were having some serious issues- dad hadn't been paying taxes to the IRS for a few years. Fortunately, my brother and I helped to get it all resolved. But I also found that the family dog, Kelly, had put put down due to mange and cancer- she was old, but I still missed her. I experienced a stupid fight on Valentines Day with a complete stranger on one of the main streets in downtown Salt Lake City, which put 100 stitches in my face and greatly bruised my ego. In March, I reached out to my old high school sweetheart from Deerfield, IL, to see if there was any hope, any chance, that there was something still something between us. I got my answer in a letter that I received in May. "Well, I am now Mrs. So-and-So," the first line read. Crushed and full of regret, I felt myself beginning to drift inside. I had to planned to stay out West that summer and still thought I would be attending the university in the Fall. But after another broken relationship with a sister of a friend of mine that summer, I had had enough. Leaving out in silence, unheralded among what friends I had in Salt Lake City, I headed back across country to West Palm Beach, FL, on a Honda 35o motorcycle. Did I begin to think mostly of eternity then? No, I was too broken. But I did begin to focus on God more. As I looked out over the city that early morning before most of its citizens were awake, with a loneliness that seemed to inhabit every part of my being, I remember looking up into the stars and saying, "God, I need to know that at least you are there. If you are, I can make it." And with that, I turned my motorcycle away from the city and disappeared into the darkness.

Was it when I got married and had 2 kids? No, in fact, it had the opposite effect. It is amazing how quickly 24 1/2 years can zip by seamlessly among school work, ballet classes, soccer games, band practice, school trips, family trips, family gatherings, and work. Days turn into weeks, weeks into months, months into years, and with no conscious thought or control over it, our lives do seem like just "a puff of smoke." No, I didn't think much of eternity during this busy period in my life. If fact, I think I just positioned God in the back seat of the car and put on the cruise control.

Was it losing my job as an investment broker, going through bankruptcy, and going through a divorce with my wife? Yes, this did much to tip the scale back towards thinking more about God and eternity, but it wasn't the major thing. There is a truism I have come to understand: the more assets and things that you own, the more concern and worry of losing them they have over us. But when you find that you have lost almost all of what the world holds dear and treasures, the tether that holds our interest and focus, that which holds us captive to the things of this world, begin to fray. And suddenly, what once consumed us as needs and wants begin to fade and disappear into the background and a new catalyst for living emerges and comes to the forefront: the temporary nature of life and love. It was a hard time in my life, to find myself totally back on my own. I was living by myself while my youngest daughter was living with her mom a few miles away finishing out her last two years of high school and my other daughter was off in college. How difficult was it really for me? Well, I know that I wouldn't have taken my own life, but I did find myself on several occasions saying, "God, I am not going to take my life. But, if you want to take me, I am not going to stop you." Loss and failure are interesting triggers- they can either push you over the edge or help you to see things differently. No longer having much to lose in this life, I felt myself looking at things anew. I felt myself being drawn back to the bible and just began reading more and more about God and his love and his ways. The more I read, the more the Spirit inside of me was beginning to glow and to grow as my failures and regrets were being set aside, being consumed as kindling. Each moment of my life being replayed in my mind was shaping the contrast that this world has to offer versus focusing one's life based on eternity and how one lives with that frame of mind. The deeply embedded insecurities in my life were beginning to be highlighted and illuminated to my conscious awareness and one by one they were addressed and treated by the understanding of God's unconditional love for me that totally accepted me just as I was. Where the world may grade my life as a failure and unsuccessful, God would use to his glory.

"But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong." 1 Corinthians 1:27

"If I must boast, I will boast of the things that show my weakness." 2 Corinthians 11:30

"But God said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in

weakness." 2 Corinthians 12:9

"That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."

2 Corinthians 12:10

Was it discovering the true nature of God's grace? Yes, absolutely yes! I was in a connect group through our church with my wife, Robyn, who I recently married, and came into contact with Bob, a person who would become a dear friend of mine. After a few meetings, Bob said to me, "I have a book that I think you might find to be of real interest to you." The book was entitled Grace Walk, written by Steve McVey. It was a godsend! Imagine yourself coming to an understanding that something you have striven all your life to obtain, was already yours! It just wasn't clear to you. Understanding God's grace did that for me. God's love and grace was held out to me a a complete contrast to what I had been seeking in the world. Our world is mostly driven by our performance and accomplishments, and how we get along with people. Having been stripped of most of how the physical world would define me, I had reached a point in my life where rather than going out into the world to find my value and esteem, I was drawn inward to listen to God's spirit within me. And what I found and discovered has set my heart and spirit free. I found God's grace which strips away all that we would try and establish by our own efforts and abilities. I found God to be alive and not some myth. I found within me an acknowledgement that I was a child of God by what God did for me out of his love for me demonstrated through his one and only Son, Jesus Christ.

"This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins." 1 John 4:10

"This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him." 1 John 4:9

"But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Romans 5:8

"How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! 1 John 3:1

When Jesus said, "It is finished," and then died, he completed everything for us. His death paid a complete and full pardon for our unrighteousness before a holy and just God. Jesus death enabled us to be reconciled back into an intimate relationship with God, himself. Through Jesus' death, a choice has been extended out to us like a king extending out his scepter in our direction showing us favor: we can choose to continue to give our lives away to a temporary world, our we can find new worth in ourselves, spiritually, which would change our focus to those things with are eternal and everlasting. One choice chooses the things that are seen and achieved through our efforts. The other choice tells us that Jesus already achieved spiritually everything that we will ever need to survive this life and prepare our hearts for his kingdom to come.

The longer I live, the greater the contrast I see of living for this world or living for God. Those in the world who has decided to live only for this world, think that those who follow after God are blinded and consider such things as foolishness and a crutch to lean upon. On the other hand, such releasing of our will and submitting it under God's will, by faith, is exactly what God is waiting for- the end of our self-efficiency become's the beginning of God's within us. As long as we continue to run our own lives, our own way, we will continue to hamper God's Holy Spirit to effective change our lives. Only when we can let go of ourselves, will we enable God's Spirit to transform us from within and begin to reveal to us a different mindset through which to live out our lives.

When did I turn on the light switch and begin to focus my life with eternity in mind? I did so when I truly came to understand God's unconditional and unmerited love for me through his grace. Such love and grace laid the groundwork and foundation for trust. In my trust in God, the Spirit within me has illuminated how temporary everything exists in this world. Not only that, but the Spirit has also revealed to me all the inequality, injustices, divisions, unrighteousness, and suffering that is caused by our own human natures- seeking to live out our lives by the fleshly, self-centered nature. Love changes all of that. Love has the capability to transform our thinking from a self-center base to that which become "otherly-focused." Truly love is the greatest of all motivating factor of all.

"The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love." Galatians 5:16

"And this is his command: to believe in the name of his Son, Jesus Christ, and to love

one another as he commanded us." 1 John 3:23

The choice is yours!

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"So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal." 2 Corinthians 4:18

In Christ, live your life as if you are already living forever-because you are!

In his love, I will see you back here tomorrow...

"Carpe Momentum in Love" (Seize the moment in love)